Hello word! Welcome back to another blog. Here are my weekly highlights from 3rd-9th July. And this one was a busy one:
Monday: As usual I went to my early morning shift on Monday mornings. Afterwards as usual I went home to have a quick nap. Except this time I got up an hour later. Whilst it threw me off slightly, as I had to get some stuff done before salad days rehearsals, I had a feeling my body needed the extra bit of rest.
Later on I went to my salad days rehearsals. I was abit hesitant to go at first as there was a situation with the train which meant it could be delayed. But I went and I'm glad I did, as it was the first rehearsal in the auditorium and we ran through 2 main numbers. I also felt better mentally, as sometimes a change of scenery is what is needed. I even saw someone from a different group in The Actors Workshop Nottingham, who was also from Newark. So it was nice to have a chat with someone on the way home.
Tuesday: Tuesday was a busy one for me. As usual due to being late back on Monday nights, I started the day with some morning yoga and taking the dog out for a walk. I then noted and applied for some jobs on Spotlight and Mandy, one of which was in Nottingham and it was casted by the same people who casted Moulin Rouge! The Musical. Now this would be huge if I got this role as not only would it be my first professional credit, but it's at a venue that's accessible for me. I can never know if anyone has received my emails, as I wondered if Spotlight have something on if we can check to see the status of the spotlight submissions. but after listening to a replay of a live broadcast yesterday during work, it may give me the answer I need.
I then spent the hour editing my latest sketch which I aim to post at the end of the week. This sketch is linking to my thoughts on a certain variety show, which may be controversial but sometimes you need to take risks and know that not everyone will like everything.
Then after initially planning on doing some final prep before heading out to Nottingham, I decided to have a nap. Due to not sleeping great the night before (which is most likely due to nerves), my body needed rest in order to help me give the best performance. I felt loads better after that, and after getting everything ready, I tucked into some chicken steaks and Waterloo Road.
Later on, I headed my way to Nottingham, and the colleague who is helping me with the documentary came to watch as we needed footage for the piece. After a hectic journey there thanks to traffic, we made our way. To say that me and the group only did a one proper run through, I think we did very well. I'll be editing my bits in the future to post on my socials, as the recording had to be taken down due to something personal (which I will explain in a future blog), but for now here is a picture of this beautiful poster which helped promote the sharing:
Soon afterwards, I went to the pub to wind down. I felt much better as before I had an upset tummy due to nerves, but once I got down there I was eating my Greggs baguette like a pig. And I must say the lemonade was so refreshing.
During the pub visit, my colleague talked to my fellow actors about the documentary the people he met and networking with a lot of people. he hoped to make a little something with my fellow actors, turning it into a possible pantomime, which is not a bad shout. It may be something initial, and we may not come back to it until later on, but at least it's something to bear in mind so that when the next project comes along, we'll have something to work on.
I think that today was a success overall, as I came home to bed, flat out, satisfied I got to surround myself with people I get to call "My Family".
Wednesday:
Wednesday started with me walking my dog and going to the gym as usual. I also noted a video diary on my way down with the review of the performance and how well it went. I also stated what I would be doing today, which I will mention in this segment.
After some exercise and a nice hot shower, I noted and applied for some jobs on Spotlight and Mandy, and then looking at a audition script for a audition I had later in the day. I wasn't originally going to plan this in my day but I think I dealt with it well. I just simply tweaked my schedule, where I would spend an hour looking at the script and then spend the rest of the day before the audition doing some other stuff.
Once I looked at the audition pieces I started another Act On This podcast with showreel producer Chris Stone. He is a genius when it comes to showreels, as every quarter he and Ross Grant do a showreel surgery, where they look at 5 showreels, and tweaking them to make them the best they can and in order for actors to gain the work they dream of. I won't give too much away, but as always it's been very insightful and after thinking of booking a showreel scene with him to replace a scene I did at college, I think I've found my scene partner for it.
After getting some lunch, making yet another trip to the shops to get something for tea (as my dad was due to go for a meeting and would be back later, only to have him returned home after not feeling great), and filming myself having a boogie (as music is good for the soul and I want to show people on my socials this too), I then filmed myself doing a callout for more autistic creatives. One of which was Michelle Jeram, but she can't be part of the filming due to her filming series 2 of Granite Harbour later this year. I managed to get a few replies from my other creatives, and I've not had chance to reply as I need to video replying to them on camera. But when you're working towards gaining full time acting work, working a day job to keep the money coming in and also learning about adult life, it can be very overwhelming. But I'm slowly learning day by day that there's a solution to every problem, no matter how big it is.
Later on in the day, I had my audition and it was safe to say it was nice and relaxed. the people who I met were new to this as well, so I praised them for doing this themselves. this is important to mention as the people who are casting/directing the projects are just as nervous as the actors themselves, so don't be afraid of creatives like producers, executives and directors, as they are human just like us. Afterwards they sent a lovely email (which I need to reply to), thanking me for auditioning and that they'll let me know the results next week.
To end the day, I finished the rest of the Chris Stone podcast, and tucked into my dinner whilst I watched the rest of Waterloo Road. I only have 1 episode left to catch up on and after seeing the trailer for the next series on Instagram, I'm already so excited for it. I then noted some more Spotlight and Mandy jobs and finished ended the day on a high by learning some more languages.
Thursday: Thursday was a strange one for me. Normally I would go to the gym on Thursdays before work, but I slept in bed for an extra hour nearly, partly due to not sleeping well again the night before, even though I went to bed early. Normally in these situations, I would be thrown off as I don't like change, but I've been slowly getting better at how I deal with things not going to plan. So after I took my dog for a walk, I did a home workout instead. Yes it wasn't the same as the gym but at least I got my body moving/my daily exercise in. And that's what counts in the long run. As anything is better than nothing.
Soon afterwards I made hot dogs for dinner tonight. I suddenly realised when I got the sausages for it out that there wasn't enough for 4 plates. I know there are 3 of us in the household but I normally have an extra plate for myself, just so that when I come back from my longer shift on Fridays, it saves me one less thing to do before my early shift on Saturdays. But when there's a will, there's a way, as I aim to get some veggie sausages for myself either before I start work or the next day when i finish work.
Soon afterwards I then got started on doing follow up emails to more Casting Directors, updating them with my new showreel, and what I've been up to, in the hope that they will come and watch Salad Days.
Friday: Friday I had my 7 hour shift at work. This time I saw someone who used to work there. I was so happy to see him, but strangely I got upset incase he forgot to see me. Some of my work colleagues clocked it and wondered if I like him. I wasn't so sure as I liked him but I 'know if I like him "that way". But regardless if he feels the same or not, it was brilliant to see a familiar face and it literally made my day.
I then came home and did some yoga. I was aware of it being the rehearsal where the run through of act 1 commenced but I didn't want to overwhelm myself.
Instead I had a relaxing evening, watching episode 2 of "Inside Our Autistic Minds" presented by Chris Packham. This episode was really eye opening, as both the people he visited had traits in which I connected with. One person was Anton, who likes routine and schedule, and if things weren't right, he would go as far as not even going to work. I related to this completely as I mentioned in a previous blog about getting up late, and how it overwhelmed me as I didn't get to do this things I wanted done, and it exhausted me throughout the whole day. But his video he created will be the first of many steps to be more open to his friends about his diagnosis as not only will it help them to be there for him if things get too much, but to also educate and help others.
The other person Chris met was Ethan, who was hyper sensitive to noise, and sat at the back of the class in order to concentrate and avoid eye contact with everyone, which is another autistic trait. This one really inspired me as with his video, the arts are a luxury, as he created a rap about how his autism affected him, with visual affects to take everyone on a journey. Since then he has been able to make friends and he even got praised not only for being open about his diagnosis, but also for his creativity, giving him this newfound confidence, which is why the arts are so important. this next point about why it got to me may have mixed opinions but these are my thoughts.
After watching the documentary, and it mentioned about the hyper sensitivity to noise, and after he read the last blog I got a little bit of a telling off about how he comes home drunk after a night out, (Ooops), but there is a point to this. This is the link to Ethan's film, where it, talks about hyper sensitivity, and how little things for me like keeping the hallway lights on, even for a slipt second, not having the doors shut when noise comes through and not being in bed to fall asleep to, when he has a tv in his room, this will explain everything: BBC Two - Inside Our Autistic Minds, Ethan's Film
There is also a point to make about what I said last time which did get me a telling off. As for Anton, even other areas in his life like his mum changing her hair sent him into a meltdown. But for me, when my dad des come home tipsy, him not being in bed to fall asleep to, when he has a tv in his room, how when my dad comes home tipsy (which if he reads this I know he’ll get annoyed with me but int thing to make a point), what the guy went through and my experience makes sense to me now. Again not to say he's a bad dad (as he's the best dad in the world), but I think if he does think about getting tipsy again (as he works hard bless him so I can't blame him for cooling off), instead of coming home drunk at home, get drunk at someone else’s house. Here is Anton's video to show you all what I mean: BBC Two - Inside Our Autistic Minds, Anton's Film
Saturday: As usual, I started my day but going to work, and caught up on an Act On This broadcast.
On the way back I saw the musician who came in the other day. If I was walking down I wondered if he would've seen me. He looked well though, and I messaged him back to let him know I saw him and that he looked well.
I also then had my usual nap to catch up on my sleep.
Once I had a nap, as usual I edited my blog and also wrote my stories. I've just about completed the first draft of one of them, which is enough for me as then at least I have one less thing to worry about before show week. Then I can tweak it and other ideas i wrote during the week after my show as creative self care.
I then started to read Tom Parker's Biography. I knew this would be a hard read, as Tom Parker was a member of the first ever band i went to see in concert, which is the Wanted. This also was a hard read as the thought of death does scare me, as I'm not sure what lies beneath after we have gone. But I'm learning to enjoy being in the present, and that as long as I'm happy, that's all i need. After the first chapter, I was looking forward to seeing what's next.
After I finished reading, I began to plan my week. Normally I do it on Sundays but because I had a rehearsal later in the evening and I needed time to relax, the sooner I plan it out the hassle it'll save for when I get back. I noted down the stuff I needed to do and then when I scheduled it out everything was fairly simple.
Afterwards I watched an episode of Coronation Street with my dad. Normally he would be out on Saturdays, but because he's going back to the pub tomorrow, he insisted we watched one episode. this was good as yes we may not be up to date, we will be eventually. And I find its also good to be ahead before we watch the episodes as part of my job is to be up to date with the soaps and what's happening, so not giving him the answers to what's happening is fun to do.
Sunday: Sunday was possibly a tiring day, and I have a feeling I’ll have many more of those in the next few days.
After work I tried to go for a nap before rehearsals but it was physically impossible. So I decided to do some calming yoga instead and it helped massively .
Afterwards I gathered some roles of the small pets from coronation street and Hollyoaks and watched some Hollyoaks whilst I had my dinner. I then slowly made sure I got everything ready for rehearsals. It was going to be tiring as I needed to stay longer for the run of act 2, as I missed act 1 due to needing a night at home to rest my body. Thankfully someone was willing to give me a lift home which was needed as I didn’t want to get a 10:30 train back knowing I had a 5am wake-up call the next day (although I get up 10 minutes earlier so I don’t oversleep). During the rehearsal, I had a costume fitting, which I thoroughly enjoyed. It's interesting to see what you wear, as its the costumes that help you get into the character deeper. There was one dress I needed working on but other than that and a few accessories, I am sorted. We then went through Act 2 and started running through act 1. I feel it went well. there are obviously going to be minor tweaks to it but it's looking in a really good shape with along with those minor tweaks, me and the rest of the cast will give the audience a performance they well never forget.
On the way home, me and the guy helping me with the film did a clip of I've just done, and also talked about the deadlines for the film itself. He revealed that the Royal Television Society awards was happening at the end of the year, and it made my brain go into overdrive. But if there's anything I've learnt so far, is that sometimes it's moments like these where they make or break you. And after an exercise we did where I spoke my thoughts out loud, I may be onto something.
What have I learnt this week? I'm stronger and more resilient than I thought. And I’ll definitely need that motivation over the next few weeks.
See you next time for another blog, and until then...
This is the autistic actress singing off :)
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