Hello world! Welcome back to another blog! Today I will be giving you my weekly highlights on the week of rememberance Day and Rememberance Sunday!
Monday: To kick off the new week as always I watched the rest of Saturdays Strictly Come Dancing. I know who was out at that point, but the show as always gives me the energy I need when I’ve got the early morning shifts to go to. I then went to work where I rehearsed my lines for the script and thought about the dialogue for some of the bits in between. I also thought of dialogue for an impressions routine and also a sooty and sweep routine, so I needed to plan to write it down ASAP.
After my usual morning nap after work, I walked my dog. But had to miss out on watching The Virtues due to getting something to go with my lunch, which was my fault for not getting it sooner but it just went out of my mind.
To kick off the afternoon I read the script for my film and sent feedback. I was impressed with the starting point, as my team have a real talent. Yes there are some tweaks to be made but aside from those I’m impressed with the starting point. This then led onto starting the first part of the Act On This answers session, where one question made my blood boil. It was how someone said to an Act On This member that we shouldn’t email casting directors. This made Ross Grant's blood boil as every casting director he’s had on said to members to contact them, as they are the customer wanting to see if our products (aka us as actors/creatvies) would be worth purchasing. The whole podcast was nearly 3 hours long so I made the decision to listen to the rest the next day.
To slow my brain down after a mammoth first half of the session, I updated my budgeting table and did a survey. My aim now is to do at least one a day and even if I don’t get the results I want I’ll have achieved something anyway. This then followed by a nice relaxing session of yoga, where the dog barking after my dad went out again to do a job didn’t help, but I managed to get through it. Afterwards I then renewed my Spotlight membership and got a domain link for my website. Now all I need to do is get the money out of my premium bonds as it’s an investment.
To wind down for the evening I walked my dog and watched last Tuesdays Coronation Street, where I’m starting to feel sorry for Daniel, as with it being the anniversary of Sinead's death, this is the last thing on his mind. But with the truth about Daisy and Ryan coming out eventually it’ll be interesting to see what he does especially with what I’ve seen on the online articles. Even Margo below is excited and intrigued to see what happens next.
Afterwards I scheduled tomorrow and watched the first half of The Virtues episode 3. In this episode Joseph went back to the place of his childhood which then led him to drinking again, which I feel is an escape from what happened. And after seeing spoilers on the internet I’m learning more about Joseph's childhood, and I wonder how the last episode will pan out, but also see if Dinah can get the answers she wants. I then finished the day with checking my socials whilst I drafted an email to the Nottingham operatic society. This was then followed by learning some more Korean.
Tuesday: I started today with watching Mondays addition of Doctors. One storyline was suni helping an old friend with her son, which he did, and I’ve noticed Scarlett looking at him either when things went bad or good. I’m starting to think that yes Scarlett may think he’s a player, but maybe he’s proved her wrong and that she does like him. Who knows, but with more episodes to come, I wonder how the feelings will prevail.
I then went to the gym. My headphones weren’t working again for some reason, so I decided to use the walk there and back to learn some lines in preparation for parts of a sketch I’m filming later on and also craving some emails to casting directors. Whilst o was at the gym I noticed that one of the equipments weren’t working so I did something else. Yes it may have been a low resistance but it felt good to try something different, as I’m targeting other areas and getting ahead of those who don’t try new things. And that was an achievement for me.
As soon as I got back, I then looked at submitting a few jobs on Mandy and filming lets of my sketches. I only did part 1 and 3 of the showreel sketch as I noticed a casting on Mandy that needed to be self taped. So I decided to do those today and then film the pantomime parts tomorrow morning before I get my haircut. It’ll also give me chance to pick out a costume for the child in particular and I do have a rough idea on what I’m wearing.
I then filmed my tape which wasn’t the best I’ll admit, but getting it done is better than getting it perfect. I then miraculously (and I say that as I thought I would go mental) reordered my showreel and sent it to my editor who normally does it for me. And I thought I wouldn’t be able to get it all done in a day, but I knew what I wanted so the sooner I can get it edited, the sooner I can send it off to casting directors and end the year on a high.
I then finished episode 3 of The Virtues and started the first half of the last episode. I really do hope that Dinah gets the closure she needs and after a traumatic event from Joseph and he and Dinah was getting passionate, the truth about what really happened will soon come to light.
To kick off the afternoon I listened to the rest of the act on this answers session, where I’m now up to date with the 5 latest podcasts. Still an insightful podcast and one was about getting in touch with directors when agents have submitted me for a certain show. And that was what I did after the podcast, as I drafted some emails to say that my agent subbed me for a role on a show I really want to be on and if it’s still casting I would love to get a self tape for it. But I drafted it at first and then I can send it either tomorrow on the way to get my haircut or Thursday before I start my day job. Either way I will get those emails sent to help boost my chances of getting seen.
Along with that I made sure that my document was up to date and made a note of who I needed to email next. I even sent an email to a company who performed the little mermaid back in august, hoping I’ll get the opportunity to find out how I can get involved. This then followed by doing an assessment for a new job. But the dog didn’t help as she wanted to bark and play with her ball. But I kept going and in 15 minutes the assessment was finished. Fingers crossed I get the result I want.
To wind down into the evening, I did some surveys (which I did quite a lot of) and walked my dog. This was then followed by scheduling tomorrow (and even more essential given that tomorrow I’m getting my haircut) and edited my review of The King and I for my blog. As I’m writing this I’m just about finished it as now all I need to do is put it in a draft and possibly add some photos of the cast members. I haven’t scheduled it in yet, but when there’s a will there’s a way, and I’m sure to find a way to make time to look at it.
I then winded down Watched the rest of the final episode of The Virtues. It was a brilliant series and both Stephen Graham and Niamh Alger both played brilliant roles, but I was wondering if there would be a second series or if that would be it, as it would be interesting to see Joseph after he faced his past and also the outcome of Dinah after she makes a risky move at the end of the series.
This was then followed by rehearsing the crucial parts of my sketch ready for tomorrow morning and then watching episode 4 of the last series of Ghosts. And I think my French definitely needs to be more consistent, as Robin’s skills is brilliant! Laurence Rickard (who played Robin and also Humphrey in the show) has definitely had some French lessons.
I finished the off the day with checking my socials and learning some more Korean and French. I even managed to get one of the jobs on Mandy sent in with the deadline being tomorrow. A perfect end to a brilliant day.
Wednesday: watched the first half of Doctors. But this was slowly followed by rehearsing the talking moments of my Christmas sketch. I figured that would be the better option, just so that I can get it in my head when I start filming that morning. Soon after doing a home workout (where I thought I nearly died during it) and walking my dog, I then filmed the slots needed for my Christmas sketch. As I’m writing this, other than the Christmas list scenario, all I need to do is film the talking moments and we’re good to go for the edit.
Shortly after I made a steady walk to get my haircut but on the way I emailed some casting directors. It was a lovely appointment and a much needed appointment as well, as I needed to get my haircut. Thankfully it’s still long but it’s nice, today and the split ends are now removed, and that’s good enough for me. My hairdresser is lovely, so during the appointment we talked about life, strictly come dancing, recommendations to watch and how when setting up a side hustle I don’t necessarily need a website as the power of social media does wonders. So all in all a great appointment.
After getting some treats on the way back, I watched the first episode Hanna whilst I had my lunch. I’m willing to give this a go in preparation for the Jonny Boutwood masterclass and get through at least the first series. Then I can make notes on series 2 and 3 so that if they only have a script from that series that fits my casting type I’ll know what it intels.
To kick off the afternoon I applied for some more day jobs (which replaced me writing my content I thought of on Monday but I thought the sooner I apply for these day jobs the better) and tweaked this blog. This was then followed by starting a new read which was “The Magic Fish” which I got when I was in Birmingham. This was in the form of a comic book so I was wondering if I was going to enjoy it. But I’m surprisingly getting stuck into it and I can sort be imagine the voices and the scenario happening in my head. And that is something magical. I can’t wait to continue reading it.
After learning some more Korean (where I compelled my daily goals and upgraded to Super Duolingo for a few days), I tune gathered day player roles from Hollyoaks and Doctors. It wasn’t all of them but I’m nearly up to date from last week, and I know the last two from that week will fly by quickly. This was then followed by doing a survey before tea.
The evening consisted with me having my acting class, which focused on talking about having dreams. And it was interesting to say the least, so interesting that I couldn’t even speak my dream as it was just so random. But I’ve made a note of it and I aim to turn it into a future story for people to read. As they do say that the best ideas do come from your dreams. We then recapped our characters from last weeks session, and even though we had to adapt we managed to pull it off. Like with practical aesthetics I’m still struggling to get my head around the idea of what we’re doing for the final class along with monologues and improvisation games. But once I get into the flow of things I’ll be able to enjoy it.
I then winded down by tweaking my blog and watching the rest of Tuesdays Doctors (with Margo in the picture below looking very cute). Zara’s meeting might have done the trick, as it left off with Al looking at the card for a therapist Zara recommended. Let’s hope that it’ll be the start of also journey to getting help. There was also someone who was in Coronation Street as a guest role, and want a good job of it she did. I then of course checked my socials and quickly looked at my 4th instalment of TV Recommendations. After looking at previous instalments I feel it’s nearly finished. I just need to add one more picture and have one more read through of it and then it’ll be ready to post.
Thursday: I clicked off this morning by watching some Hollyoaks whilst I tweaked my review of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang ever so slightly. It had everything in it from rejections to revelations. I can see why Ste would be mad, but I feel that Lucas is trying to hide a certain amount of his feelings by pretending to be cool, so I think what Ste really needs to ask Lucas is why he did what he did.
I then went to the gym, where on the way there I messaged two directors who I recently saw on an Act On This podcast, one of which taught me a valuable lesson in believing in myself in order for others to believe in me, and the ither informing me that a positive attitude can go a long way. On the way back I drafted some posts for social media, which I was going to do on my break at work later on, but I thought whilst I couldn't listen to my music, I might as well did a much needed task to do then. After walking my dog, I then cooked the tea and changed the bed (which felt like forever after struggling to find a few things, but we did it in the end). For the dinner, I had to add some extra noodles on as I felt like the portion sizes in general weren’t great.
To kick off and wind down before work, I watched Wednesdays addition of Doctors. After Kirsty’s big mistake, I really wouldn’t want to be in Amy Jones’ shoes, and I definitely do not want to be in Zara’s bad side after a chat with Nina. I also felt bad for the new midwife she was taking on, as she was really trying, but we learn by making mistakes. Not just in acting but in every aspect of life. I know I made a few for sure. This was soon followed by Tuesdays episode of Hollyoaks. All I can say on that score is I hope Rafe will just tell her the truth, as he’s starting to get on my nerves. And as for James, I get why he wants to spend some alone time with Ste, but calling Ste’s kids horrible names really won’t solve anything. But I do hope they get back together as yes they’re complete opposites but they were brought up similarly.
I then moved onto watching episode 2 of Hanna whilst I had my lunch. So far I’m liking this series. I wouldn’t say I’m loving it but action is an interesting theme. But I’m willing to see it out in prep for any questions anyone may ask.
After posting my review of Boiling Point onto my socials and getting some Christmas goodies, I then went to work. This shift was actually okay, and despite a crying baby it all went well. I even managed to help a customer which amount of a butter was the better value for money so I think I did a good job on that. I even got a message from my group about going out for a Christmas meal which I’m definitely up for. It may mean having to come in work tired but I know that it’s not very often I get to see people outside of my class.
I then headed home and tucked into my dinner. It was surprisingly delicious and the flavour really blended in with the noodles and I thoroughly enjoyed that meal. I then as always before bed checked my socials and learnt some Korean and French. I didn’t complete my daily goals as I needed to get to bed but at least I attended the session and that's what counts overall, and also because I had to be up earlier to take my dog for a walk before work. I also had to apply for an acting job and also look at my new showreel which got sent this morning and it’s safe to say it was perfect. Now all I need to do is send in the money and get it sent off to casting directors, other creatives and to also end the year on a high with new material.
Friday: I started Friday off by watching the rest of episode 3 of Hanna. I’m slowly starting to think that Erik is a criminal based on his past but I’ll soon learn slowly more as the series progresses.
After emailing a casting director of my self-tape and also some spotlight jobs she subbed me for I then went to work. But today was emotional, as I feel the pressure got too much for me. During the shift I was struggling, and as I came upstairs I started to feel breathless. I wasn’t too sure if it was a panic attack as I’m not a doctor, but I knew it wasn’t right. But I did the right thing and told a member of staff, who then moved me onto a quieter task before lunch.
It started to get better from there as I spent the last hour on the shop floor where it was much quieter and it made a big difference. That was all thanks to my work colleagues who came to check in on me, including the branch manager himself. I think I've said it before, but he has a family member who's autistic like me, so it's great to have someone, especially in management, who gets how hard it can be at times.
What I did when I got back, I slowly made my way to watching episode 4 of Hanna. In between that, I posted my Shakespeare monologue online, followed by walking the dog and doing some yoga. This session in particular felt different, as I needed to let off some much needed tension, and it seemed to have done the trick.
To wind down, I watched the rest of episode 4 of Hanna, followed by the first part of I Am Ruth starring Kate Winslet. This was a special feature, which told the story of Ruth trying to help her teenage daughter Freya who is going through a rough time. There was parts of me that could relate to Freya as during college I was body conscious as being a tall girl I had to be careful on what I wore. Now I've learnt that it doesn't matter what other people think, as maybe they're conscious on what they look like, but they take it out on others (which is often the case with most bullies). So my advice on that one is if anyone judges you for what you wear, ignore it. I know it's easier said than done but who you are is just okay.
I then moved onto watching Wednesdays addition of Hollyoaks. I look forward to what Sienna has up her sleeves, but after seeing spoilers online, I fear it's not going to end well. I also didn't like James' outburst about Lucas and Leah either, as even though they're Ste's kids, James knew that he would play a big part in their life too. Although I don't think Lucas' tormenting didn't help either, and I hope Ste can see that it wasn't right either. I then ended the day with checking my socials and learning some more Korean and French, where because I had to be up early the next day, I only looked at the mistakes now that I upgraded again. Somehow that helped me completed my daily goals, so I was happy with that in the end.
Saturday: After watching more of I Am Ruth (where I watched the last 5 minutes later on, and it was so powerful), I went to work. At first it was okay but then I got emotional again. I think partly it was because I was on my “female problems” but also after how I’ve been feeling I feel as though I’ve been on the edge of an autistic shutdown again. So it was important that today was a day of self care as yes whilst it’s good to be productive sometimes doing nothing is productive.
As always I then got home and had a nap. I struggled to get to sleep at first, as I let out emotions that I’ve been keeping subside of me for a long while and after how I’ve been feeling, it may be linked to something which is linked to an autistic shutdown. I know it might not be as I’m not a doctor and me being the me I am the hypochondriac inside of me is coming out to play, but it’s vital that I keep an eye on myself just incase.
After gradually getting to sleep I then watched an episode and abit of Hanna, where after nearly finishing the first series, it’s starting to get more interesting by the minute. Even though I'm still not gassed by it, watching the show in preparation for the class is still beneficial so that if anyone does ask questions linking to it I'll know what they're talking about.
To draw the afternoon to a close I read more of The Magic Fish (where a story of a classic fairytale just tuned dark) and scheduled tomorrow whilst I listened to the first half of an act on this broadcast. After walking my dog, I then watched more of episode 6 of Hanna, where she has to sacrifice a friendship to stay safe, and watched the first half of strictly come dancing. It is now the week before Blackpool, so the pressure is really on. But Nigel Hartman from Casualty really put it in the bag with the couples choice. And when the judges referred to him as Gene Kelly, that’s what o thought as he looked so much like him especially when dancing.
I then watched Thursdays addition of Hollyoaks, followed by Gogglebox. But it was slowly interrupted with the sound of beeping coming from the car on monoxide machine. But thankfully we don’t have a gas fire so we should be okay for a few days. Thankfully my grandad was on hand to take the battery out otherwise it would’ve kept me up all night. I then of course ended the day with checking my socials and learning some more Korean and French.
Sunday: As always before my early shift I watched more of Strictly Come Dancing. Soon enough I went to work where once again it didn’t go to plan. I struggled and spent most of the shift back in the quiet room when the shop opened. But I managed to find enough energy to come down for the two minute silence as it was also Remembrance Sunday.
When I got back, to cheer me up I walked dog and watched the rest of Gogglebox. It’s brilliant when you have ways that being you joy and those were just the medicine I needed.
The afternoon consisted of a more self care afternoon, where I gathered some more day player roles and watched the rest of episode 6 of Hanna, where slowly but surely Erik will tell her about her past and who she really is.
This then moved onto watching Thursdays addition of Doctors. All I can say is some of the queries these patients have are strange, like a young boy’s confession. I won’t give away what it is but let’s just say it’s very understandable once you know the emotional impact behind it. I also really hope that Scarlett can see that Suni does genuinely like her after another moment at the end of the episode. I’m also glad that Al may finally be on the mend, and despite a panic attack near the end of the episode, I don’t want it to set him back, it rather relate that he needs to take baby steps. I then prepped for the new week by brain dumping everything and scheduling tomorrow whilst I listened to an act on this broadcast. I then did some Yoga, where I did a different routine. This time it actually helped me prep for the new week, which was a positive.
After walking my dog and having a nice hot shower, I then settled to watch Fridays addition of Hollyoaks. It definitely had all the drama, with Nanna telling Mercedes to not throw away what she has with Felix and John-Paul finally starting to realise what Carter has been doing. I then moved onto the first part of the last episode of series 1 of Hanna. I then watched an episode of Coronation Street from 3rd November and then the first part from 6th November. It definitely got tense, as Daniel may be starting to realise that Daisy has not been so faithful and that eventually he may tell her that she wasn’t up to no good, especially after Ryan told him he was in love with her.
I then ended the day with checking my socials (whilst applying for some more jobs on Mandy and judging my agent on jobs on spotlight) followed by learning some Korean and French. I think after the day I had this was a much needed session.
What have I learnt this week? I need to take some time to reset for me. And I shouldn’t be afraid to ask for what I want.
See you soon for another blog. Until next time…
This is the autistic actress singing off :)
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