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Actor Jam, Chilled Day off and Meeting the man behind Peaky Blinders

Hello world! Welcome back to another blog. This week was going to be busy for sure, so here is what I got up to in the week where the most popular yearly event in the Midlands took place.


Monday: As always to kick off the week watched the rest of Strictly Come Dancing. I think Craig was harsh on Angela Scalon’s Waltz as I thought it was fantastic. Yes I’m not an expert but I was going with the audience on that one. I then went to work at first I was abit scared to go in after feeling anxious and still feeling the knock on affects later on (although being on my female problems didn’t really help either), but I persevered and got the job done.


After coming home and having a nap, I then walked my dog and watched the rest of Hanna series 1. I’ll aim to try and watch as much of series 2 before Saturday but with also learning a script from one of the shows he’s casted (which I still need an update on) that also needs to be a priority.


This was then followed by listening to the first half of an Act On This podcast with Spotlight success manager Mel brown. I’m already learning so much now that I know what I need to do to get this website up and running.


After doing my usual yoga routine, I then rang Steve Watson, where we talked about going forward. It was definitely a lot to take in where after the talk, I made the decision to let those who I’ve casted for parts know how so they can get their lines learnt ASAP. We also had the chat of coming over to talk about the next stages of the plan before going into production after Christmas.

After waking the dog, I then watched abit of Coronation Street (with my dog looking very cute as we do watch it). Even though it was a heartbreaking time for Paul, I managed to see the funny side of it, especially when he was stuck in the bath and billy had a bad back. I won’t give anything away but let’s just say that the negative turned into a positive very quickly. I also wonder if what’s recently happened at the factory will be the start of Peters exit storyline, as even though Audrey decided not to hand Peter in, he’s still abit shaken up about what happened with regards to Stephen. Even though I haven’t done what Peter did I do relate to how something traumatic in your life never leaves you.


I then of course ended the day with learning some more Korean and French whilst checking my socials and scheduling tomorrow, whilst tucking into another decorate your own pumpkin cookie. And I feel that after my chat with Steve it’s going to be a long day.



Tuesday: I started the day with quickly rehearsing some of my sketches and also going to the gym. I was going to rehearse on the way there and back but after the past few days of going into autistic shutdown I felt as though I had to preserve my energy for it. But I still managed to have an awesome session at the gym where I decided to do legs and upped my weights on one exercise. Something that I’m quite proud of myself for.


After a taking my dog for a walk and noting some jobs on Mandy I then filmed my talkie parts in my sketches. I’ll be honest I really didn’t have the energy, but I did it and that was the main thing. As it’s important to stay consistent. Yes we all have down days, weeks or even months. But it’s important that we give 100% into what we’ve got. As getting it done is better than getting it perfect.


Soon afterwards I continued an application for a new day job and drafted my call-outs for new crew member. This was then followed by starting the new series of Hanna, in preparation for the Jonny Boutwood masterclass. I’m now intrigued to see what Hanna does now that she knows more about her past and how to stop what’s happening to other girls who have been through her situation.

To kick off the afternoon I listened to the rest of the Act On This podcast with Mel Brown. After making some important notes, but also having to recap some bits just incase my notes don’t make sense, I now know what to do to make sure my spotlight profile is up to date and ready for the new year. Before Steve Watson came I did abit of self care by updating my budget and surveys. There have been a couple of days where I didn’t manage to do as survey therefore breaking the one survey a day minimum but the best thing to deal with it is to dust yourself off and start again. And that’s what I did.


Before long I had that VERY long chat with Steve Watson about the next stages for the project. We managed to solve a few problems but we also needed to get some next steps in place before Christmas. It felt like a lot but I’m proud of how far I’ve come, even if it did stress me out abit.


After walking my dog, I then watched episode two of series 2 of Hanna, where she goes through a shocking journey about the drugs linking to Utrax, which was then followed by the last episode of The Long Shadow. Boy what an ending it was. I did not expect the jump cut to the present day as I learnt more about those affected by the murder and also more about George Oldfield in the aftermath of the case. I was going to bed more or less straight away, but it took me about 10 minutes just to get up after processing everything. But I guess that’s what a series, especially one based on true life events, does to you. It really does make you think. Even margo enjoyed it!

I then finished the day off by checking my socials, learning some Korean and French and checking my socials. Now that I’ve also got the script sent in for the Jonny Boutwood masterclass, I scheduled some time in to look at them and pick one by tomorrow. Yes it’s a tight squeeze but the sooner I pick one the less stressed I’ll be.



Wednesday: To start the day I watched the first part of Doctors, where Scarlett and Suni are literally the talk of the town. And whilst most of the staff aren’t too angry with it, I hope it doesn’t affect their ability to keep their work life seperate from their personal life.


I then went to the gym, where I increased a weight for one set, and I would proud of myself for doing it. I also changed my order of exercise where I did 3 reps of the same exercise in a row. And it did wonders for me. I will definitely continue this when I next go. On the way there and back I looked at  the scripts in prep for the Jonny Boutwood session. I think I have a rough idea on which ones I’m going for, but I would need to double check with my teacher. after walking my dog as always I then applied for a few jobs on Mandy and Spotlight and edited my Chris Stone showreel sketch. This was one task done, as the next stage would be to post it. I will do this on the Saturday and very early in the morning so it’s the first thing people see.


I then managed to cast someone else for my film, which was a huge milestone. This was then followed by looking through the scripts for Sunday again, with my decision possibly being made. So much so I actually started the practical aesthetics process, and I think that’s when I know the script is right for me.


During lunch, I started watching the first episode of another new series in prep for Sunday, called Girl/Haji. This stars Kelly McDonald, centering around a Japanese Detective going undercover in a case in London, where his brother plays a major part in it. I won't give it away as I'm still trying to get my head around it, but because there are scripts from the second episode of this series, I felt I needed to watch both of them so that I can get a general idea of the synopsis of the show.


To kick off the afternoon I started to tweak my blog but for some reason it wouldn’t upload the images. I think the best thing I need to do right now is to turn my laptop off for abit but then turn it back on again. I will try this in the morning before heading off to actor jam and see what happens from there. I then finished reading "The Magic Fish" (which is the most beautiful ending and with a couple of pages left about the author’s backstory I can’t wait to read it) and learnt some Korean and French. I managed to get a big chunk of it in, and even managed to complete my daily goals in the process.

To finish the afternoon I gathered some day player roles whilst watching the rest of Mondays Doctors. And now that Suni's and Scarlett’s relationship has come to light, whilst Sid may be okay with it, I’m not too sure Nina might be. And with Wendi Peters’ exit coming soon, I have a feeling this might be linked to it. I also fear for rhuma and Jenny after a busy day in the hospital. But I think that’s now the reality of the NHS and how there is more to be done to help those on the frontline. And I fear it may not be the last we see of the dad.


After watching my dog I then watched the rest of Girl/Haji. This left me wanting more, as the ending of episode one literally left me open mouthed for at least 10 minutes. Now all I need to do is watch at least episode 2 (as it contains the sides from that episode for the session with Jonny Boutwood) and then I’ll be good to go.


I then had my acting class. We continued our work on devising and prepping for our livestream on the final session of the year. I took part in a couple of improvisation games and I had a lot of fun whilst doing it. It was good for me as well as with my shutdown a few days ago I needed a pick me up, and boy did that help. My teacher even mentioned about how we can incorporate some of the games and monologues into the characters. This gave me real food for thought as it’d made me wonder how to incorporate Shakespeare into an introvert if I go down that root. But only time will tell. After getting a few questions answered by my acting teacher, I ended the day with checking my social media profiles.



Thursday: Today was Actor Jam day for some of my friends from The Actors Workshop nottingham, meaning it was a good excuse for me to have a drink and make a night of it. But I still had some jobs to do before I went, and I didn't set my alarm, giving me a chance for my body to wake up. This made me get up later than normal, but I guess my body needed it.


To kick off the morning I watched Mondays Hollyoaks. At that poiny John Paul finally discovered the truth about what carter is doing and his reason behind it, which I kind of guess it in the first place, as I know that the majority of bad people aren't born that way, but it's something frm their past that triggers that feeling of prepressing it. I won't give too much away on that score, but let's say that the shock of that plus all the other LGBTQ+ characters in the show coming together to celerbate who they are is one you do NOT want to miss.


I then moved onto doing some yoga. This one was more of a calming session just to help me steady myself and also relax for the show tonight. Even though I wasn't performing, I was still debating on whether or not to put my name in fo the golden ticket, knowing that I did it twice and that there might be others who didn't get that chance already. All in all I had to see how I go from there.


Soon afterwards, I then walked my dog and finally managed to get my blog up and running (which was just the case of swithcing it off and then back on again) and cooked the tea, where I was going to have my one for my lunch before I went out. this was then followed by appling/nudging my agent on some jobs on Spotlight and submitting myself for jobs on Mandy. i'm surprised how much I got done in that area as I'm nearly up to date with the applications. And with my Mandy yearly membership coming to a close, I needed to apply for the jobs I wanted now more than ever.


After a quick trip to the shop to get a sandwich for later plus other goodies (like the pudsey biscuit and badge above), I spent 30 minutes learning some more Korean and French. Seeing as I was going to be back late, I thought I'd do my learnign then so that when I came back I can more or less head straight to bed when I'm done. A smart move indeed, and was very relaxing.

It was then time for lunch where, I watched Tuesdays addition of Doctors and Tuesdays Hollyoaks (whilst getting ready in between). For Doctors, Bear was the hero of the town but for the husband, it had a very worrying affect on him. I may have not had the same upbringing as him, but after explaining about his wife being the only person there, I do get what its like to meet that special someone who gets you when no one else won't. It actually got quite emotonal at the end, and I won't give too much away, but lets jsut say that it was one of the many things staff working for the NHS still face today. For Hollyoaks, Carter is still in denial about everything, and it's clear that he was still holding onto his past after the previous episode. I also took an Darren’s struggle to give his dad the best birthday ever, as even though Jack insisted to not make a fuss, Darren will do anything he can to make him happy. Let's hope he won't get himself in too much trouble.

I then of course headed to Actor Jam, the night I have been looking forward to. In the end I decided not to go for the golden ticket. Yes it would've been great to get picked to perform again, but I know that there are others who haven't had that chance, and have applied multiple times but didn't. Also after going into my usual autistic mind, the thought of being picked unexpectedly got overwhelming. So I decided to sit back relax, caught up with alot of friends and enjoyed a night of pure entertainment. And it's not very often I get to do that. I will say this though, the talent in the room was unbelievable. My freinds from AW smahed their speeches, but I was quite surprised that the ones I was rooting for didn't get at least a special mention. Mind you eveyrone bought thier A-Game, so I guess it depended on what the panel and audience were feeling at the time. I even had the chance to do my pitch up for my film, and it was a quick one as alot of people had alot to say so I made it brife. thankfully I had a couple of people mention about it, and I will get back to them with the detials of it ASAP. But overall it was a good night, and one that was definitely well needed.


When I got back I managed to have a little bit of supper before I scheduled the next day. I was aware that it was late, but I thought the sooner I put it in the better.



Friday: The last day of the week. As before I didn’t set my alarm just so that it gives my body a chance to wake up on its own. And I was right to do that as it felt so good to relax. Also thanks to the adrenaline of last night I couldn’t sleep, so even more reason not to set my alarm. This also affected my schedule just abit, but I managed to work my way around it, and I actually got most of my jobs for the day done, both in my career and in my personal life/my own enjoyment.


I started the morning by learning some lines at breakfast in preperation for Sunday. I then had a job interview over the phone. I was surprised by how well it went, as I fear I didn't have enough time to prepare. But I learnt to just relax, be me and know that whatever happnes happens. Fingers crossed I get the answers I want. After walking my dog, I then did a home workout. At this point I wouldn't have done it, but I know that I’m someone who invests in my health, so I did a nice workout that wasn’t too intense was just enough to wake me up and feel good. And felt good I did.


To kick off the morning, I learnt some Korean and French. I know I had the whole day to fcus on my career, but I felt as though I needed to do something outside of acting for now after the anic chaos of the previous night. So doing something that makes me equally fulfilled is just as beneficial. This then moved onto typing up some of my self written sketches (which include my impressions routine and sooty and sweep routine) and rehearsed my lines for class on Sunday. I just need to recap my objective for the scene and then I should be all prepped. Although as I was doing it, I noticed that I went abit off schedule but that’s okay as things do change, as I was later about to find out.


To break for lunch I watched abit of episode 2 of Girl/Haji. This was the episode where the scripts that were sent out to us for sunday were from. Even though I decided not to go for one of those scripts, it would be good to note the time codes incase I do want to take on a scene from that show.


To kick off the afternoon, I started by drafting some emails to casting directors and other creatives. This wasn't originally planned but because of a change of plan linking to the venue for my film, I had to arrange my day slightly. But it was a good job I did do that, as with the final class of the year comign soon, this gave me one last shot to invite them to see what me and my friends were working on, and better still from the comfort of their own home.


I then watched the last 10 minutes of Girl/Haji. I’ll be honest I don’t know if I’ll watch the rest of the series as I only have one day to learn it followed by work and also learning my script, but I watched the episode I needed to watch so at least that went to plan. This was then leading onto doing some more surveys, which helped me rest and rejuvinate for when I go back to work tomorrow. I have compelted the majority of Octobers surveys on one website so that was an achievement for me.


To finish my day off on a high, I went on an Act On This Rapid Fire Friday call. I didn’t get the chance to ask a question but someone asked a question where they did everything but feels abit stuck. But producer Petch (as Ross was in a voiceover session) advised them to rinse and repeat and also create their own work. And what advice it was. Something I still need to take on board to this day. To help settle into the evening after a brilliant day yesterday, I walked my dog and did a ten minute yoga session. I know I did a workout earlier but this was just to help me settle down as I needed to be up very early the next day.


After briefly scheduling the next day and watching the first few minutes of Wednesdays Doctors, I watched this Mondays coronation street whilst tucking into a delicious Chinese. All I will say is fingers crossed I hope that Bernie doesn’t get too long of a sentence for Paul’s sake, and that Amy will start to think about herself after talking to a fellow victim.

I then rounded the day off with watching Wednesdays Hollyaks. There was a lot to go on. I hope that Leela finds the perfect gift for Joel, and that Darren will be able to sort out his money troubles in time for the festive season. I do also hope that Rayne’s killer is finally caught after hunter and Zoe’s discovery shocks them both. I then of course rounded the day off with checking my socials and doing one last Korean session. But then I had to quickly update my budgeting table, as with christmas now fast approaching it's important now more than ever I'm so cautious of my money. But with mayday coming soon and now that I'm going to be back at Belvoir Castle for the Christmas run, I'm hoping that what I get will help cover the presents and many trains to and from the venue.



Saturday: As always Saturday was back to my day job. To start with I watched the rest of Wednesday's Doctors, with the main storyline being Al and his road to recovery. And it seems its going in the right direction, and now that he knows he needs helps and his fears of doing so, it'll help motivate him to get o the right path.


I then of course went to work, where at first I did have a little tear or 2 after the picking, but once I got to face up on my favourite ailse which is bicuits, as I've got a massive sweet tooth, then it started to get better. I've learnt that the key to helping me regulate my emotions is seperating myself from my collegaues so that it saves me energy to speak to customers if they want anything and also cling onto a area I like. In this case, find anything sweet.


After getting home, I was going to have a nap, but I struggled. So I simply chilled out and just rested. In that process I developed a monologue that I already wrote before, but thought about how to make it more affective by making the character speak to one person and also posted y latest sketch onto my socials. Please see the link for it here: https://youtu.be/MRVknkiTU5w


After getting some last little bits for lunch I then had my lunch and watched the first past of series 2, episode 3 of Hanna. Just like with Girl/Haji, I know I won't be able to get through all of it, but as long as I know the general plot of the series I should be okay.


To kick off the afternoon, I looked at and did some final prep of my script again and watched some of the film, just to get a general idea of it. I realised that it was casted by a different company, which then made me wonder of Jonny worked with them for abit before coming to Shaheen's and then when he went out on his own. Either way, it's a good script and one to fit my casting type.


I then started a new read, which was "Sanpdragon". Like with "The Magic Fish", this was set as a comic book. As i'm writing this I feel I'm nearly half way through the book, and it is very interesting. As mentioned before with comic books, you can visualise whats happening, how they sound, the backgound musci it would have if it was a film/tv series. I also got to learn on who Snapdragon is herself, and all I can say is after learning about an elledged "spooky person" who has a interesting job, I can't wait to see how this unfolds.


Soon afterwards I then scheduled tomorrow and started to brain dump next week whilst listening to the first half of an act on this podcast from 13th. I knew that as I would be busy tomorrow, I wouldn't have time to do the brain dump then, so I thought I'd at least make a start on it, as it was better than not starting at all. This was then followed by walkign my dog and knowing I won't get time the next day, I did 10 minutes of yoga to help me wind down and relax. Before dinner I then watched the rest of Hanna, and all I can say is what a series it was. I know that I won't get to watch the rest of it now, but there may be a possibility i may continue it after the session. Who knows.


I then watched Thursday's addition of Doctors whilst i got everything ready for tomorrow, where Rhuma and Jenny may get time off after an altercation in a previous episode. I do feel sorry for Jenny as she only started working there, but rhuma is right on the system being broke, and the pressure the staff face everyday to make sure everyone is happy and healthy. There was also another storyline where Rob had an issue with the head teacher and how he did something which on the outside seemed inappropriate, but because of the state the head teacher was in, I don't think it was intentional, and after rob talked to him, I can understand the pressure he must feel. This also gave Rob the chance give one parent the wake up call she needs after she made a complaint. It ended there, but lets hope it isn't another Frankie Sharp storyline as thats all we need before it finishes next year.

To wind down for the everning I watched Strictly Come Dancing, where it was now live from blackpool, so this meant bigger productions and even bigger dance numbers. I'll be honest, I’m still gutted that Layton and Nikita still haven’t got a 40, as I felt like it deserved it. But wiht muscials week coming soon, and with it being Layton's speciality along with the style of dance they're doing, it surely has to happen. I then moved onto watching Thursdays addition of Hollyoaks, where as the mystery of who killed Rayne reaches its climax, a confession from both hunter and prince changed everything. And that's all I can say on that matter. I then of course moved onto watching Googlebox, where one of the shows they reacted to was Survivor. And it was a proper show where you literally had to fend for yourself. If this is just as good as I'm a Celeb then I need to watch it.

To end the day, I checked social media and sent my showreel money to my editor (with my dog above being very helpful indeed). Now it’s ready to be posted onto my socials, my spotlight profile and send to casting directors jsut in time for Christmas. I even managed to draft a sketch based on one of the hosts at The Actor Jam saying that if I can't think of a monologue or a song, make it up. I also wrote it down so that it’s fresh in my mind and that when I do film it, I'll have that first draft there.



Sunday: Today was the day of the workshop. But not before I went to work. Before then I watched more of Strictly Come Dancing, where her charlston made me want to do it as well. But again like with Layton and Nikita, it still didn't get a 40. I know Craig is a judge for a reason, but at this point surely they should be getting 40s by now, as this is getting ridiculous. But I feel she has a shot of being in the final, so before then and in the final if they do that dance again, surely they should get that 40.


I then headed off to work. There was no picking to be done, but I surprisingly had a better day. I just seperated myself from everyone else and I managed to get my jobs done, and so far that seems to have worked for me, and I plan to use this method in the future. Of course then I reherased my lines for the workshop that afternoon, and I managed to get a lift back from one of my colleagues, which was really lovely of them. I did ask if they wanted me to pay for any petrol, and they olitely said no. But it was good to ask anyway.

As soon as I got back, I walked my dog and checked my socials (as I knew I would be back late so I decided to do it then). I then had some dinner whilst watching Fridays addition of Hollyoaks. Originaly I was going to go straight to Nottingham to meet a few of my friends for lunch, but due to other commitments, I decided to head home so I can reset before I head back out.


For Hollyoaks, I'm really glad that Jack had a good birthday, as even though he insisted that he didn't want making a fuss, having people who loved him and care for him is just what he needed. And despite a mix up with the Frank Sinatra tribute act, he througuly enjoyed himself. Although I hope Darren will be able to sort out his money troubles, especially now that his daughters medical bill has come through. But when theres a will, there's a way. I'm also shocked by Hunter and how even though he didn't commit a certain crime, but his involvement in proving his innocence in past scenarios has shocked me to the core.


I then made my way to Nottingham, where I managed to put up with loud noisy teenagers (and on the way back as well), but it was a good journey all in all. Once I arrived, I decided to pay a cheeky visit to the market, and bought myself a sweet treat. I knew I wasn't going to be able to eat it all before the class, as I didn't want to make myself sick. So I simply had half before the class and then I saved the rest for later, putting it in a little carrier back I had with me.

It was then time... my workshop with the legend that is Jonny Boutwood. It was such an amazing experience, as not only did I get to perform my script, but he did everyones scene a few times and chnaged up certain things. I now know what to do when I refilm this scene again and how to let my instincts come in. I even got the chane to ask him a few questions, and even mentioned my short film. He seemed to be interested in it, and he said to let him know once it's complete. At that moment it felt like getting an MBE from the king himself, so lets hope that I can get the film to its deadline by and invite him to the screening ASAP.


As soon as I got back, I knew I needed to be in bed quickly, but not before I did some final jobs. These included updating my budgeting table, quickly brain dumping everything else before scheduling tomorrow. This was then followed by a quick session of Korean where yes I didn't complete all of my daily goals knowing I had a long day and I needed to be up very early, but I managed to keep my streak going. And that's what its all about.



What have I learnt this week?

Surrounding yourself with the right people will make you happy, more fulfilled, and in some aspects, reignite your reason as to why you chose to go in a certain profession. And that’s what AW has done with me, and I can’t wait to continue being a part of this wonderful community in the future. 


See you soon for another blog. Until next time…

This is the autistic actress singing off :)


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