Hello world! Welcome back to another blog. As we come into half term for most schools in the country, I had a more busy week. But the end of this week brought some new exciting opportunities.
Monday: To kick off the morning to a new week I watched the rest of the festive special of Gogglebox. I had to watch the rest at lunch as I overslept again. But thankfully I managed to watch a fair bit and made it in time for my taxi at my day job. This included a section called fur babies, where after abit of a rough start, a new bunch of puppies were born safe and sound.
I then of course had my day job. For some reason I enjoyed this shift, as at one point I had to add in one drop to a route after it was one drop short. I felt like the hero of the hour, and I hope that the staff got to see my hard work pay off. I even asked for abit of overtime to help me cover my weekend in London, but due to money they couldn’t. And it was probably a good job they said that, because as I’m writing this I do feel rather tired.
To kick off the afternoon after a nap (where Margo as you can see wanted a few more minutes), I started writing my review of Romeo and Juliet. As I’m writing this I’ve just got two more actors that stood out for me to write about, and then along with adding the photos I’m more or less finished. This is also to help promote the company and again save me more stress for when I go away.
I then moved onto starting the first half of an act on this podcast with showreel producer Chris Stone. These sessions are always brilliant, as I’m learning something new and also reminded of what I’ve learnt before to help jog my memory. I even think I’m getting better at when I’ve seen enough from a reel, which for me is a start and also what scene links to them the most. Now that is the eye of a casting Director and directors indeed, and I can’t wait to watch the rest before my weekend away.
For the rest of the afternoon, I tweaked my monologue before printing it off successfully. I may not have had a proper run through other than in the morning but at least I managed to get it out on paper, so than I can write about my character and gain that bit more information on it. I then did my yoga which surprisingly I was nearly on schedule for. I was over by 3 min tired which for me I was proud of myself for. The final task of the afternoon was to start packing for the weekend. It wasn’t much as my clothes I was going to bring had to go in the wash, but I made a start which was all that matters. I couldn’t put my snacks in the case as I was worried that if Margo ate this it’ll make her sick. So I shall simply put them in the night before I go.
After posting a section of my valentines sketch on my socials bar YouTube, I then watched Coronation Street from 5th February. This involves Simon getting into more trouble again, and some controversial views once again on Sarah and Damon’s relationship. I can understand why Gail is having concerns as she doesn’t want Sarah to get hurt, but I also understand why Sarah is upset as it’s her own decision and that even though they don’t have to like Damon, they need to respect that she’s happy. I’m also starting to see why Tracy is drawn more to Tommy after Steve’s “efforts” to winning Tracy round. I hope it doesn’t go on for too long as pretty soon Steve will find out his hoer will soon turn into his worst enemy.
The night then ended with me learning some more Korean and despite messing up a few times, I completed my daily goals and reached to the top of the leader bird. This was then followed by checking my socials whilst scheduling the day for the next day and applying for another acting job. This made me think that before Friday I need to make sure that all of the jobs I saw on Mandy and Spotlight are up to date and that I’ve not missed anything out. Am that made me think that on the morning I will go through Spotlight briefs one more time before I go just to be sure. This will also save me more stress to do it over the weekend as I want to enjoy myself.
Tuesday: To start off Tuesday I watched yesterday’s addition of Doctors. I was up 10 minutes later again so I could only watch the first 3 quarters of it. However it had me hooked from the beginning, from Maria and Joel’s relationship unbeknownst to Luca to Scarlett being nervous about her driving test. This one hit me hard as I know my sister was also nervous for her test and was gutted when she failed the first time. But if she can pass so can Scarlett. And with the urgency of telling Zara about suni, I dread to think of what this will do to Nina when she finds out the truth. I then made my way to work, which was moved from Saturday to today due to my weekend away.
After having a nap, during lunch I watched the start of the masked singer. Amongst all the chaos of life at the moment and what’s to come I need to switch off and tune to something to help me relax. And as always this show was one of them. I’ll be gutted when it’s over, but I’m so looking forward to the final.
To start the afternoon I continued on my review of Romeo & Juliet. As I’m writing this I’m very nearly finished, and that I need to add the photos and then I’m done. So watch this space. I then moved into finishing the rest of the act on this podcast with Chris stone, which now leaves me updated on the 5 lasted podcasts. I also got to saw someone’s reel who was in the community before and learnt that even though they said no transitions, they had them there as because there was such a variety in her showreel it was just to make sure they were watching. The lady whose reel it was did a brilliant job, and Chris himself was even more of a genius by putting it together. If you’re not following Chris yet what is wrong with you? His work literally changed actors lives and one thing I learnt from that is don’t procrastinate but act on it.
I then made some notes of my script whilst I oriented off a new version and started my line learning strategy. This is where I take the first letter of each word and learn it from there, gradually taking my eyes off of the script. I’ve used this technique before and it all came from my French exam. Shoutout to my French teacher Mr Shivas for helping me use this technique in my acting career. And I can’t wait to continue using this technique.
I then moved onto a home workout. I knew I wasn’t going to get there gym in this week but thanks to the fitness circuit from Matt hall during the life enhancer challenge, I managed to get 20 minutes of sweat on therefore making more effort to develop my health. I could’ve done better but the important part is consistency is key, and I didn’t make the excuse of not going to the gym to get my exercise in.
I then slowly packed more of my things for the weekend. It wasn’t in the case as I didn’t want to interrupt my dads programme but they were all in one place so that I can put them in it in one go. This was then followed by editing my full version of my Valentine’s Day sketch. And I’m proud I got it done in that time, as with the big day coming it was more important than ever I got it done. And just in the Nick of time.
Before I took my dog out for a walk I watched the rest of Mondays episode of doctors. I don’t think Nina is accepting that her son broke the rules and that he will suffer the consequences, but after seeing spoilers I think Nina knows more to this than the others let on. Either way I can wait to see how suni responds.
I then watched the rest of the masked singer whilst I had my tea. I knew one of the celebrities under the mask and I was so pleased that it was them. I won’t say who it was in fear of spoilers, but let’s say I was surprised they were out as I thought they would make the final, but the clue I would say is that they were in a movie with Hugh Jackman. And now that the final 3 have been announced one of which I was surprised about, I can’t wait to see how it pans out.
To settle in the evening I tucked into some delicious M&S pancakes (as it was pancake day after all) and watched episode 5 of Waterloo Road. You do have to feel for Miss Spratt, as kids like Schuey really do get on your nerves, but how she handled it was out of character for her and unprofessional. But after seeing his dad and his life behind school, I can see why he is the way he is. Let’s hope that someone can get to him in time before it’s too late. And Dean is really good at being a dad, but with Kelly-Jos decision, obviously he was gutted but also he knew that it was her decision and not his. And I do hope that Mr Guthrie sees lobby’s true extent of her manipulation as the way she was to Samia and what she did t miss Spratt was toxic. Maybe because of the background she had she just wants attention which as I said before happens when kids feel neglected or treated badly if they haven’t worked through the process the right way.
I then of course checked my socials and learnt some more French. I’ll be honest that lesson was shocking, but the fact that I’ve been busy working and getting up early 5 days on the go has not helped. So maybe a good nights sleep is what’s needed. But I did apply for a few acting jobs in the process which yes I’m not sure they’ll be looked at knowing it’s so late, but getting it done is better than nothing. And that’s something to be proud of.
Wednesday: To kick off the day I watched Tuesdays addition of Doctors, where I watched the last 10 minutes of it when I got back from work. This one saw the extent of Suni's lies come up to him and thy even though Nina is trying hard to not believe it I think she knew that he would cause trouble. I also feet bed for Scarlett when she didn’t pass her test, but as the saying goes, if at first you don’t succeed try and try again. And I’m sure she will pass, as I know she needs a distraction from Suni. I do also hope that Luca and Maria will wonder why Joel has bene playing them both and that it doesn’t destroy their friendship.
I then of course made my way to my day job, where I had a mixture of feelings. These were the fact that it was okay despite facing up, but I managed to do one run of my monologue for Saturday which is always good. I even encountered a lady who said if all the halloumi gone it’ll be on her lol! And she mentioned about some burgers she tried and how delicious they were. It made me wonder if I should try new things more and more, abit like this weekend and how yes it’s scary but I’m just going to, in the words of Matt hall, feel the fear and do it anyway. I also felt abit ill when I had my lunch, but that was I think because I was tired. It after a few rounds of darts and a delicious Krispy Kreme valentines doughnut it did the trick. I even promoted the performance to a few people I know and I’ll do the same with other creatives tomorrow.
As soon as I got back, I did some yoga. I was surprised I didn’t feel tired when I got back, as I felt it on the journey home. Now after a stretch I feel a million times better, and sometimes you just need that extra movement to cool down after a long day. This was then followed by gathering some day player roles from the serial dramas and noting some more jobs on Mandy and Spotlight which I applied for later. This was then followed by walking my dog.
Before class I watched Mondays addition of Hollyoaks whilst I had my valentines dinner consisting of delicious steak and chips as seen above. There was a lot of go down, as I feel that Dilly is just desperate for people for the wrong reasons, and that I feel that Dillon does like great but still harbours those feelings for Lucas. But I know Carter has his way to stop it, and the sooner it gets discovered the sooner people will see what sort of a person he is. I do hope as well that Joel will understand why leela did what she did when he finds out the truth, and that I hope James will stop ste from going back to old ways after a big secret (which has prompted Lucas to go back to Carter).
To end the day on a high I did my acting class. I’ll admit I was getting abit drowsy after the last few days I had, but I knew that this group would make me feel so much better. And we recapped meisner and also looked at the next few steps. Whilst it did put a smile on my face, there was a pet where I did start to loose interest. But it was good that I noticed it as this technique is all about being present in the moment. And with the homework for next week I will take that forward with me. I was going to ask my teacher something at the end but I would just message him as he had other commitments to attend to.
After class I watched doctors from today. This one saw suni face Zara, Al and Sid after the investigation involving Harry. I know it’s what they had to do, but I think Sid was being abit harsh in the way he approached it. I can see that suni was only trying to help a friend but went about it the wrong way and I hope that this meeting will give him the wake up call he needs so that if he gets to keep his job he’ll learn from this mistake.
I then ended the day of fours with checking my socials (but only my acting ones) and learning some more French. I did get off to a doggy start but after a while I managed to complete my goals and be top of the leaderboard. So all in all a good end and fingers crossed I get to stay at the top. I also planned out tomorrow which includes making sure I have everything for Friday and that if I need anything food wise I can get it while I’m there. I’ve also decided to do my 20 minute workout at home so then I can work it around packing up and also my other jobs before work. So a good strategy to come in with.
Thursday: To start the day I watched Tuesdays addition of Hollyoaks. This one was suspenseful, as now that the truth about Leela's lie has been discovered, Joel is left more confused than ever. I know he’s a good person deep down, but I’m hoping after that revelation he knows that someone is going to walk out of this in tears. I also praise James for doing the right thing, as even though Ste says it’s just once, with what he’s been through it’s never just once. But I have a feeling Kane will get revenge, I can just feel it. I also hope Beau will let kitty know how he feels, as now that Maxine has moved on, it’s time he should go for what he wants. I then did a workout with exercise presented by Matt hall from the life enhancer challenge once again. I feel I did slightly better this time as I had more energy and motivation in me. And that is what I need, as the more I push myself, the easier it’ll be.
As soon as I finished my workout, I had one final run through of my stuff to make sure I had everything. I spent a good hour and a half of it, and as I’m writing this I have more or less got everything. I just need to pack in my pajamas and toiletries and then I’m ready. But it’s also good to have another check just to be safe. My dad even said he’ll do the cooking whilst I prep for the weekend. It’s moments like this where I live my dad as even though I worry he’s taking on board too much, it’s moments like this where I’m so grateful to have him.
I then sent some emails to more casting directors and creatives, and I even had a visit from my Nan. This was a nice moment as normally we do cooking on this day. But because I’ll be away this will be the only time I’ll see her. And Margo certainly loved her fuss from nanny, as she couldn’t wait to get her belly rubbed. This was then followed by getting rid of some stuff off of my phone (some of which I did whilst nanny was there) and checking my socials. This was so that even though I didn’t need to be up early, it’ll give me all the rest I could get in prep for travel.
I then watched Wednesdays addition of Hollyoaks. I’m not sure about Abe at this point, as even though he may have more sinister intentions, I too would be frustrated when someone’s isn’t committed in a relationship as I am. But after the ending and the sexual tension building on between Joel and Cleo, it did leave me on tender hooks. I also wonder how long Ste can build up the facade after James made sure that Kane would keep his mouth shut. But after his plan to find it more about James and worth Owen Warner’s exit looming, I feel this may be the start of something that won’t go well. And even though kitty is living a lie I feel that she and Beau have the chemistry needed. I’m still wondering why she did take someone’s name, but I guess all will be revealed soon.
I then made my way to work. This shift was okay but during before and between it I managed to play some darts. As you can see I managed to hit some trebles, but my darts are starting to break (most likely due to me using them constantly) so some new stems are what’s needed. Hopefully sooner from myself or from others.
As soon as I got back I watched the premier league of darts whilst I had my tea. The only full match I could watch was between Luke littler and Gerwyn Price, and it was a good game to watch. It was also the first time I saw Luke Littler getting frustrated, and it’s not like him. Mind you when you come across players like Gerwyn it’s hard to not notice. But at least they didn’t end up in a fight on stage which was good. And even though I hate price, it was a close call to say the least.
To end the day before bed, as always I checked my socials, (but only my acting ones) applied for an acting job and learnt some more Korean. As I’m writing this now I’m nervous for the next few days. I know this ain’t my usual routine and my usual meal times but I’m going to stay calm, have find and trust that there is food on hand.
Friday: The moment came! The day of travelling. I was feeling more nervous than before but I reminded myself that if I’ve managed to stay a night in stoke in October then I can do this. But I am aged to do some stuff before my new adventure
To kick off the day I watched Thursdays addition of Doctors. This was added Suni's panel review, and that at least I’m glad Scarlett came to show her support after Suni apologised for his recent behaviour. I wish I could say the same for Joel, who totally played Maria and Luca like fools. It had nothing to do with his sexuality, but at last make it clear to than what’s happening.
This was then followed by a relaxing session of yoga. This was just so that it helped me calm my nerves before my big adventure. And what a session it was. I then made sure I had everything packed. I doubled and triple checked everything and other than my landyard (which I was worried about but then I gradually calmed down about it) I was ready to go.
I then did some relaxing tasks so that I wasn’t getting overwhelmed but wasn’t overdoing it either. These concluded checking my social media handled and applying for some acting jobs/nudging my agent on some I found on spotlight. This did feel relieving as the earlier I nudged them/applied for them the less overwhelmed I got. And I also know that it would mean one less thing to do whilst I’m away. This then moved onto gathering some day player roles and scenes from the serial dramas. I only just managed to get up to date with Doctors and Coronation Street but not Hollyoaks. However I don’t complain about it but I simply did what I could, and I still felt the huge benefits for it.
I then whilst I had lunch watched Thursdays addition of Hollyoaks. I did not expect the twist between Joel and Abe, and I know you can’t help who you love, but you have to feel for Leela when she finds out that Joel and Cleo have been together. And something tells me that Nancy will be moving fliers to carters secret and that kitty may need to be careful with the way she acted around Theresa. Otherwise she will get caught out.
I then made the journey to London. As I write this I am a tad nervous about all of it. But sometimes you need to experience this so that you can grow. After a brief stop of if my taxi would come, I finally made my way to the Airbnb.
As I made it to there, I was amazed by how at home I felt. I think Adam my brain reassured me that it would all be okay. And I really got to know her and about her life. I do feel as well that after abit of a shaky start I think that this weekend I’ll be just fine.
At the event itself it was surprisingly calmer than I thought. Normally when I go to acting events very full on. But this was so chilled, laid back and with access needs in place and knowing if we need a time out we can, it was a very homely event. I have a feeling that this weekend will be a joyful one.
Saturday: Saturday was the full day of workshops. I started the day with my breakfast and watching abit of YouTube. I use say it felt abit cosy eating in the kitchen and it wasn’t too crowded either so it was a very wholesome morning. And it had to be as I didn’t sleep the best the night before. But that didn’t stop me from going into today with an open mind. I’ll go through in full detail what I did in a future blog, but for now here are snippets of what I did on this day.
The first session was a dance workshop with a company called blink. One of the leaders was called Frances, and he was just a bundle of joy to work with. We did plenty of exercises and movement pieces like tapping different body parts, a game called cake or friend and a game with elevating bands. These were all very interesting and had their own unique effects. They were definitely mindful in some aspects as they get you to focus on the here and now, which I think is what I needed. A wonderful workshop indeed and I have a feeling that I’ll look into this company for the future.
I then moved onto a zain class. Before this I never heard of zain. But I wish I had now, as after making a story and expressing myself using different exercises, it’d actually therapeutic. I wasn’t too sure about attending this class due to tiredness but I’m glad I did. And I wish I did more of this stuff at home, which I think will come sooner than I thought.
After the zain class I had a rehearsal of my monologue for the performance. They were really pleased with my results and that even though I was nervous I’m glad I ran it through. This was then followed by heading back to my Airbnb for a chill before I get performance ready. This was a mixture of having a lie down on the bed, learning a session of Korean and making sure i had everything packed for when I left the next day. And it definitely helped, as when I got my makeup on to get ready, I felt refreshed recharged and ready to perform. I also managed to sneak in abit of YouTube before the performance which I know some would say it’s procrastination but for me it helps keep my brain calm, regulated and it helps me with overwhelm and nerves .
It was then time. Performing my monologue. We didn’t have a packed audience but you know what? I didn’t mind, as the setting is supposed to be relaxed, calm and disabled friendly, which for me knowing that this is my first time performing something I wrote myself to a live audience was just want I needed. There were also plenty of other talented performers, and what they showed that night was amazing. I won’t go into full detail because as mentioned before I’ll mention all the talent in a future blog about the weekend, but there are definitely stars in the making, and I hope that access acquired will be the starting point of these amazing performers. I then performed my piece, and despite a stutter, I carried on and it was a real crowd pleaser. And now that it’s been filmed, I’m hoping that when I post it on my social media platforms everyone will like it.
To end a very tiring but rewarding day, I I had the rest of my KFC and made sure I definitely had everything packed ready to leave home. During this I realised I left an earring and now I’ve lost it. But I wasn’t too worried as it was only a cheap one from Claire’s, so it didn’t bother me as much. What was more important was getting to bed and being ready for home time, where I watched abit of YouTube to help me with that.
Sunday: Today was the day I leave. This was a shame as this weekend has been a blast. After I had a bit of breakfast I watched abit of motherland with my friend. I wish I heard of this show sooner as it looks like a lot of fun. But it was also nice to see them before I left. I then made my way to St Pancreas international. I was surprised by how easy it was to get there, and despite carrying my case down the stairs due to the lifts not working, I got there safe and sound. And thankfully on the underground I got off the same side I got on. So that was a bonus.
I was also gobsmacked by how big at St Pancreas is itself. So I did some wondering and some sight seeing. Despite nearly loosing my case, I got what I wanted before making my way to the platform. It was a lot when I lined up in the land needed to head home, but I managed to get on. I knew it would be busy due to the rail works at King’s Cross, but I was surprised that it wasn’t packed. But never the less I enjoyed the ride home and it gave me chance to relax.
As soon as I got back I watched the final of The Masked Singer. Despite some interruptions (which was mainly from my dog lol) I watched through all of it and I’m gutted that it’s now finished for another series. And I was quite shocked by the final 2, but I’m glad my favourite won it. I won’t say who the character is or who’s behind the mask, but I had a feeling they would win, and right I was.
I then brain dumped some of my week whilst I listened to the start of an act on this broadcast from Monday. I’m surprised I managed to do that as after a weekend away I thought I would be tired. But I did it and I’m proud of it. I also heard on the broadcast about what I’ve seen on X/Twitter. I don’t know if these rumours are true, and honestly after Covid and what’s happened in Gaza and the strikes in America, I don’t want to get involved in any more drama. Let’s hope it all boils over soon. This was then followed by a quick trip to Tesco where they didn’t have what I wanted but I got an alternative. and that’s enough for me.
After waking my dog and doing some yoga, I then watched Coronation Street from 9th and 11th February. I know that Daniel was annoyed with Bethany for not telling him about the article sooner, but after changing his working it seems that he and Bethany are on the right track. I just hope that daisy will not do anything to jeopardies it. And after seeing spoilers on who the mystery woman Joel is talking to, I think Dee Dee will be set for heartbreak. And after Simon seeing what harm alcohol can do to you the hard way, it may I not be long until his exit looms. I dread to think what will happen from it. And I think that Bobby is starting to do his best to impress Lauren, and I do think he genuinely likes her, but I don’t want him to be heartbroken with the recent previews coming in. And Paul was right when he tells Adam tat life is too short, especially with Damon in the picture. But that does not stop him from giving Damon the revenge he wants. and I think that when Adam realises that this is wrong it’ll be too late. But I hope it won’t be.
After updating my budgeting table (where I've actually got money from the savings I took out) I watched Fridays addition of Hollyoaks. And Leela was quite clear on her boundaries, especially after her string of bad luck with men. But I’m hoping that for the sake of the baby, she’ll have time to think things through. That is if Joel doesn’t go back to Cleo. Speaking of Cleo, even though I can see why Abe was annoyed, with so much yet to unravel I fear it’ll turn quite nasty. I also wonder why Frankie is reacting cocky to Nancy and not to Darren, and I get that she doesn’t want her to get in the way of getting to know Darren, but there’s a way to do it without being horrible to those around Darren’s life too. And with the spoiler involving jack, I feel it’ll be a more personal reason.
After watching abit of Love Island All Stars I of course checked my socials (but just my acting ones) and learnt some Korean. I was going to learn some on the train but because of the signal I decided not to bother. But I’m glad I got a session in to a very tiring but a wholesome weekend.
What have I learnt? In the words of Matt Hall, I need to embrace the fear. And it’ll all pay off as this weekend in particular I have found my tribe!
See you soon for another blog. Until next time…
This is the autistic actresss signing off :)
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